I am DONE!!

Ahhhhh. It feels so good to graduate. Now I can start accomplishing my goals in life. Like having a kid and being broke. It will be everything I have ever dreamed of.

Big Cottonwood

It's been hotter than hell here lately, but I imagine all of you are in the same boat. One of the nicer outdoor places we can still go is Big Cottonwood Canyon, as it stays much cooler near the river and creeks. We found a nice big flat rock a little ways up the trail to Lake Blanche. There's nice trees, and the breezes blow mist from the creek waterfalls across the rock. We go up there and eat lunch or a snack on the rock, and look for birds. Lots of black capped chickadees.

Pound Cake

We've been making pound cakes with Dad's recipe in a bundt pan I got at Williams-Sonoma. Casey's a fan, she requested one for her birthday.

i love mormon postsecrets

I am going to this guy when I need surgery

This might disturb people with a weak stomache.

Nature, red in tooth and claw

We have a seed feeder and a suet feeder for birds in the back yard that Grandpa Swift bought and hung in a couple trees with McKenzie and Casey, so we usually have a fair number of birds around. The other day a hawk snagged a robin out there. The hawk was pretty wary so I wasn't able to get as good a picture as I would have liked. We were able to watch it eat that robin from the downstairs window. It was either an immature Sharpshinned or an immature Cooper's hawk. The coloring is pretty much identical at that stage, so hard to know for sure.

Happy 4th of July

I know I am going to have good time. Are you?

i am blessed

July 2, 2006

my doctor told me to count my blessings.

My Blessings

* i am blessed because i can correctly pronounce the word, gorgonzola. you want to add "gorginzilla" to your salad maam? i'm sorry, would that be the other giant lizard from an aging milk experiment gone horribly wrong that attcked your town as well, miss nakumoto?

*i am blessed because i knew long before working with food, that the term "pasta" was a broad word that allowed numerous conncoctions of flour, water, and egg to fall under it.
"oh! so fusilli is like pasta?"
"no sir. it is pasta. it is a type of pasta."
"it's spaghetti."
"no. it is fusilli."
"but, i want pasta!"
"it is pasta. pasta in the shape of a corkscrew. you know, much like the the shape of the tool your mother used to open her morning drink when she was pregnant with you."

*i am blessed because i was raised with the good sense to not wear jerseys with the number 99 on them with no real affliation to any team of any sort. is it reflective of your aspired IQ, or the weight you need to lose before your heart is in the "healthy zone" again?

*i am blessed because neither my posture nor the hair on my neck are grounds for resuscitating the missing link theory.

*i am blessed because i do not take water for granted. if i ask you your drink order, and you say nothing, then nothing you will get. water is not nothing my friends. not nothing. it is a whole lot of something.

*i am blessed because i am honest. i do not say i am ready to order, and then spend five to ten minutes scanning the menu forcing a perfectly good server to waste their time staring.

*i am blessed because i can walk. walk away as you try to prove you are ready to order. and walk back to the table when you have had time to think about your order and that lie you so boldly told me 15 minutes ago.

*i am blessed because i have an astounding memory. i can remember obscure facts such as you were drinking decaf, not regular coffee. "is that decaf? i was drinking decaf, you know. i can't have caffeine! has to be caffeine free. no caffeine for me! no sir! is that decaf!?"
there may be traces of my DNA in your mug, madam, but caffeine? i assure you, no.

*i am blessed because i have enough room in my heart to treat everyone like family. if the 10 second rule is good enough for my own blood, then by god, it is good enough for you!

--------------------

you are right doc, i feel MUCH better.

My Kickass Internship

For the next two weeks, I am lucky enough to watch the K-9 unit. One of the K-9 officers is telling me how to lean back and to keep my hands in the suit at all times so I don't lose any fingers. That suit weighed at least 35-40 lbs and was hot as hell. Underneath I was wearing khakis and a collared shirt. It was about 9:30 at night and 85 degrees so I was sweating like Gordon riding a bike, but it was worth every minute of it.







The first time they just let the dog grab my leg. The dog was pulling pretty good but it wasn't to hard to stay up. You will also notice the officer is keeping a tight leash on his dog.





This is another shot of the first bite. They train the dog to get a complete mouthful when they bite. I can only imagine if this really was some dude's leg with only a pair of levi's between the skin and the canine's teeth.





The second attack after he ordered his dog off the first time was a lot better. The canine's bite covered my entire elbow and felt like a damn vise. That suit is several inches thick and it still felt like I had slammed my entire arm in a car door. It was AWESOME.





These last two pictures were the absolute best. They had me "run" about 10 yards or so and then released the dog. Running in that suit is like a trying to play soccer in one of those carnival sumo wrestler suits. Their only instructions were, under no circumstances was I to fall over. So I started to "run and they released the dog and that canine was all over me.




It took like three steps and jumped on my back and wrapped its legs around me. I simply cannot imagine what it would have been like without the suit. The canine had my left lat in his vice like grip and was shaking and trying to pull me down. All I can say is that it has been a LONG time since I have had this much fun.